Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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