so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize
