I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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