are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
What a dumb baby whore.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
