Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
