I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize