so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
