You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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