I wannas sexs uuuuu
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I can't put those talents on a resume
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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