He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
