let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Houston, we have a blender
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
