Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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