Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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