If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
