i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
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