Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize
