They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Randomize
