Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I don't think brook has ever known best
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
