: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
