last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
