He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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