also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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