you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
