she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
