I bet he comes in French.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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