I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
