he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
