If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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