and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
