Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Randomize
