I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
