Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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