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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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