Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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