No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Just cropdusted the office
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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