kristin has been a bad kristin
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
