using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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