yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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