quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
