So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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