That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Randomize