Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
