You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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