This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
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