I just threw up on my dentist
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize