I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
