Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
His hands were made for my vagina.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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