People in love make me want to vomit
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Congratulations! We have a period
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