we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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