She's JV to your varsity
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
