I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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